Tuesday, 12 April 2011


I asked the cat to lick my aching dogs. I found the rough tongue soothing to my weathered calluses. It brought them back to life again.

My uncle once told me to never throw a leaf on a saw. It's the one piece of advice I have always heeded. I remind myself of that everyday.

I always thought Jefferson was the first black President.

They say lightning never strikes the same place twice. I wish the same was true of my girlfriend. I find domestic abuse emasculating. Two other things that emascualte me are when my cat disobeys orders to lick my feet and the fact that I deliberately tried to spell "emasculate" as "demasculate". I thought it made more sense. I dethroned your father, I deflowered your sister and even your mother's pleading sobs could not deter me.

I tell every political candidate that comes to the door that I will vote for him/her. If they don't keep promises then why should I? Today I looked through the window at one. Her sweet, hopeful face stirred something deep inside of me. I ducked down quickly so she couldn't see me. Then I ran out onto the balcony and torpedoed a water balloon straight to the top of her head. I guess that thing she stirred inside me was mischievousness.


  1. did political candidates ever go to your old door? if so, did any of them pick up that dime? they probably all picked it up... politics.

  2. and did they tell you that they were running on the anti-chinese-fish/garbage-smell ticket?